R.I.P Ike Turner

Say what you will about him, I'm not disagreeing he was a pig of a man but you have to admit, he was a genious.

And whatever 'it' is, well he sure as hell had it.

Rest in peace Ike, rest in peace.

Only in London

I've been quite busy this week with work and what not (although I do have today off and plan on going to the Design Museum to see and exhibition AND do my xmas shopping in the gift shop. I adore everything in that place. Sigh!) and was flicking through one of the weekly entertainment guides to see if there was a gig I could catch tonight. In this week alone, here is a round up of whats on...

1. Mum - at the Scala!
2. The Damned
3. Thin Lizzy (!!!)
4. Led Zeppelin
5. Billy Childish (but he has a residency at the Dirty Water club so its no biggie that he's playing)
6. M.I.A - I seem to lose all control at her gigs and dance around in an epileptic fit
7. Chrome Hoof

and this is all just in this week! Sometimes I forget how lucky I am to be here. I can't even begin to imagine what NY will be like....

The long awaited return....

After a much too long hiatus, Eurotrash is back kids! Real life too over for a while there and made it near impossible to find time to blog, but not to worry as I'm back to cajole, comment, and criticise. Woo Hoo!

So some of you know by now what has kept me away but for those who don't, here's the latest....

• I had a birthday. Twas spent very nicely thank you very much. Peter took me away for 5 days and we spent our time in Germany, Belgium, France and Luxembourg. We took his car and it was such a novelty to drive to another country. The freedom to travel without a 40lb backpack on was quite liberating and I fear Peter has ruined all future backpacking for me! We spent our time in small quiet towns where all there was to do was go for nice walks or stay in cosied up to the fire. You can look at our trip here
• Speaking of my beloved, Peter asked me to move in with him while we were away.... then he changed his mind... then he changed it back..... then he changed his mind. At the moment I think I'm not going to move in. I was all set for it but Peter keeps changing his mind so I think he may not be ready which is a shame because....
• I'm moving to New York!!!! Yes its all signed, sealed and I'm just waiting on the delivery. All papers have been signed and I'm just waiting for my visa to come through before I start organising my stuff to be shipped (as well as my ticket. All at the cost of the designers, bless them) Its going to be really hard and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't terrified (the job description they sent me was 3 and a half pages long) but if the designers think I can do the job, well then, I'm not to blame when they come over to find the store boarded up and me standing out the front preaching about Armageddon. Peter and I go through phases where we think this is the best thing in the world and he constantly talks about all the amazing sights we are going to see and then he realises how hard its gonig to be when we're apart. Fingers crossed our 'trans-atlantic' relationship works out.
• More on New York... I've come to realise that having a friend (and a free place to stay) in New York is all very 'Deirdre Chambers, what a coincidence' and I am expecting a barrage of friends, friends of friends, second cousins and mothers sisters aunts brothers to come and visit me (of which you are all more than welcome of course) but have decided already that I'm going to have a big 4th of July party as a bit of a belated 'Welcome to New York' so everyone start booking your tickets now!!

Oh faithful readers, its good to be back xxx

Blip of a blog

Bosnia. Is. Amazing. Stunning countryside and full on war damage. Every building is bullet sprayed. And then I get to see sights like this

Aruba, jamaica ooo I wanna take you to Bermuda Bahama come on pretty mama

Two days to go kids until I reach the exotic lands of Bosnia and then on to sailing round Croatia. Me? Excited? Just a little! Can't wait. Am in desperate need of adventure and I think this will be just what I need. Peter tried to surprise me and come to Bosnia but tickets were too expensive at such short notice and he just couldn't do it. Bummer. But I still plan on having a rollicking good time with Paul (one of my gay harem) sunning it up on deck and jumping off the side for a dip whenever the desire strikes me. I normally am quite vigilant about staying out of the sun (I don't look this flawlessy gorgeous easily) but being stuck in grey old London has made me long for days of feeling the sun on my back and sand between my toes. I never thought I would miss beaches this much.

So readers I'm signing off for now but will be back bigger and better and just generally more fabulous in a couple of weeks. Be good

4 days on and I'm still cleaning the feedback vomit out of my ears

So Friday night finally saw the arrival of the long awaited Sonic Youth Daydream Nation gig. I decided to take Stuart with me as he was quite keen to go as he had never seen them before and I was quite keen to pop his Sonic Youth cherry (sorry mate, I couldn't help it! Wasn't it great though?) It was at the epic Roundhouse, a historic venue that I had been desperate to experience (other pivotal moments at the roundhouse include The Ramones UK debut, Patty Smith's first UK tour, oh and its also where both The Clash and the Pistols used to hang out)

They opened with Teenage Riot, the opening track off the album which had me pinching myself that I was really there. I've never heard them play it live and it kick started things off nicely. They then played the album in its entirety, pretty much as per the album. Nothing got a huge reworking, nothing really surprised me. Don't get me wrong, it was amazing to get to experience daydream live because with such a mammoth back catalogue, anything pre 'A Thousand Leaves' rarely gets an outing. I think I even creamed my pants a little when they played Silver Rocket but I have to say it almost felt a little mechanical. Like they were doing it out of duty to there long standing fans and for them alone. The breathy whispers of Kim on The Sprawl were there, the high pitched whine of feedback was still being vomited in my ear but I felt no love. Like a mother (them) who is forced to love an ugly baby (us) because they created us and, well, they have to.

After they performed daydream and came back for an encore, you could almost here them breath a sigh of relief at getting to play some newer tunes. To quote Lee 'Enough of this old shit. Lets get back to the 21st century!' The band really seemed to liven up at getting to play some newer tracks (the encore included both Jams Run Free and Do You Believe in Rapture? which were stellar) and they finally partook in a bit of crowd banter. Thurston and Lee both showing off in their too cool for art school way while Kim danced circles (literally) around them.

Its a funny thing to witness an album that has such nostalgic ties live. Although I was a little young to experience it when it was first released, I soon found the error in my ways and it later became a huge part of my youth. It made me think of the first time I heard it and how it seemed to sum up all my teenage angst and fear and loathing for the universe. It makes me think how timeless Sonic Youth are and how although they are all well into their 50's, they are still so relevant and relatable to the new gen Y, or gen X or what ever friggin generation we are in now. How at any moment they are ready for a teenage riot...

All you need is.... a few Asahi and some baaad sake to bring out your true feelings

Okay readers if you are of weak stomach when it comes to all things mushy, turn away now because what I am about to write makes even myself cringe at, uh, myself.

Last night Peter and I went to dinner with some of his friends who were visiting London. I seem to get on well with all of his friends and he loves that. I do too. It makes social gatherings much easier when you can sit and have a conversation and not want to stab yourself in the eye with your own chopstick.

Moving on.....
A few beers post dinner Peter and I decided to go home. We were having a mock squabble over him riding his bike and me catching a cab (he wanted me to double on his bike from Soho to Clapham South!!!) when he let slip with an 'I love....' and chickened out. We got home and I thought I should take charge.
So I said it. I, for the first time in my life, told someone I loved them. Then I cried a little (wuss!) and then he told me he loved me too and that he was scared at how I made him feel because he has never felt this way about anyone before but that being with me seemed to make everything easier and when we weren't together, the pain of missing me felt like a lump in his chest.

The scary thing is that I feel the same way. When I think about the future, he's in my plans too. And when I think of us not being together, it just wrecks me.
As much as the feminist in me tries to deny it, there is some deeper primal urge that just wants to take care of him. Do I sound completely naff and old fashioned? Probably. But its true. Is this what they mean by you just 'know' when its the right person? Then what do I do?

Me? Procrastinating?

So I'm supposed to be making brooches today on my only day off from the bar and instead I find myself glued to this

who doesn't love a dog riding cowboy monkey?

Digging out my rasberry beret (the kind you find at a second hand store)

So Prince has just kicked off a two month residency at the new O2 arena and I just bought tickets. Although I like Prince, I would never describe myself as a huge fan. That being said, from what I've heard and read, its going to be a spectacular show. And as far as my booty's concerned? Well, theres going to be a whole lotta shakin' goin' on

British Summer Fashion Essentials

forget your troubles

The sun is shining, I've got the day off and a good friend from Belfast has got a 10 hour lay over and we are meeting up for a liquid lunch. Life is good today. I've got a spring in my step and I'm whistling this....

Isobel Campbell and Mark Lanegan

Wednesday night Leanne and I caught up for a few beers and saw the Isobel Campbell and Mark Lanegan gig. I meant to catch them the last time they played London but my laziness got in the way. Although both Isobel (ex Belle and Sebastian) and Mark have a huge repertoire of songs between them, however, they have only released the one album together and I was quite curious to see how it transpired into a live act. Worked it did. Mark's amazing baritone vocals were so deep I felt like I was wallowing in the depths of his octaves. He makes Lee Hazelwood, Tom Waits and Nick Cave sound like pre-pubescent choir boys, whilst in beautiful comparison Isobel's breathy, sweet, delicate vocals frolicked while Mark's gave chase. Isobel is like an amalgamation of Dusty, Nancy Sinatra (to whom she and Mark constantly get compared to. They even did a Nancy and Lee Hazelwood cover of 'Sand' for an encore which had me gasping and teary eyed) and Brigitte Bardot on her best day. And as for Mark? I have this whole idea of who he really is. He's the kind of man who spends money on the occasional prostitute, he drinks Jim Beam straight from the bottle, not because he can't afford anything better but because its his drink of choice. And he smokes Marlbro Reds.... and lots of them. But then I've always had an over active imagination.

The contrast of her light and his dark are just magic. There whole set was reminicent of 'Some Velvet Morning' It had such shape and colour. You could feel it peak and soar and then be taken down again to the depths of the lowest depressions you ever thought imaginable.
It made me long to have that breathy girlish voice that I will never have...

I need a montage!

Nothing funnier than cats falling off stuff

from fifteen to two to one

Apologies for my blogger slackness of late. I've been too busy with visitors and daunting job propositions to give you my full attention but I'm back in the land of blog so here is the latest....

• The designers finally arrived and we had a great time. I showed them around the East and took them to some great galleries (sadly they missed Damien Hirst by 2 days) and some great shopping (Hello Nog) and in return they took me to Jamie Oliver's 'Fifteen' in Shoreditch. The food was divine (I had the caprese salad with tomatoes straight from Jamie's garden apparently and the gnocchi with pork ragu) Possibly the only thing to tarnish the evening was the fact that her two kids were quite tired and decided to have a pyscho attack right there in the middle of the restaurant complete with the older daughter throwing cushions at her father and screaming at the top of her lungs that she hated us all. Oh how the other diners loved us.
• As well as having the designers here two of my friends from Belfast came over for the weekend. The two booze hounds had been to London before but haven't done the whole tourist thing so it was fun for me to play the tour guide and show them around my London. I found myself constantly smiling and looking at London with a fondness that has taken 6 months to develop but is now firmly lodged in my affections. I really do love it here now.
• The biggest news that I have is that while I was with the designers, I was quickly informed that the old offer of me being the New York Manager was still on the table. The current Manager extended his contract for another year after I had to turn them down this year but that runs out in May 2008 (coincidentally when my UK visa runs out) and he is definitely planning on coming home to Australia next year. He says he has loved New York but is tired and wants to come home. This means that I have the opportunity to move to New York for 3 years (or longer if I choose to stay on) Liane says that Dinosaur will obviously get my visa for me and let me stay in their apartment until I find my own place.... if I take the job. They seem to have total faith in me and I can't believe they are offering me the job again after I dicked them around so much in the beginning of the year. Its such an amazing opportunity I don't know if I can turn it down twice, although I have to say, its a huge responsibility plus it still scares the shit out of me (they would have to make me a Managing Director of the company and I would do all the American and European press as well as run the store eeek!) and I still don't know if I'm ready for it but I guess if they have faith in me.... I trepidatiously mentioned it to Peter the other night and he is completely on board. He thinks it would be a great experience for us to live in New York for a few years and made us start looking at apartments straight away to see where we could afford to live. Hes been really supportive and I feel really lucky to have met someone so great. I know I've got plenty of time til may next year but I figure it will be here before you know it and I'll need a fair bit of time to mentally prepare myself as well as sort out all my visas and come home for a visit (which I'm doing in March so lookout!) so I really need to make a decision quite soon about if I'm really going to do this this time around. What do you think? Am I ready?

I love spending other people's money

I got an email from one of my old bosses yesterday saying that she would be in town this week and wanted to catch up. I'm so excited to see her but I immediately started to think of fabulous restaurants that I've always wanted to go to here that I could never afford otherwise. I'm thinking Claridges, Ubon or the Oxo Tower Restaurant. Any other suggestions?

OOIOO goes all tribal and early Tim Burton on yo ass

Man, these chics are cool.....

the Aussie invasion

Recently I have made a few discoveries of Australian products available right here in London, making my exsistence all the more enjoyable. As well as the overpriced Aussie supplies store near Covent Garden, Sainsbury's now stock both Vegemite AND Tim Tams, Selfridges are about to start stocking Aesop skincare products and the best discovery I've made so far is that we are now able to get Coopers beers in selected supermarkets! Hurrah! Now excuse me while I go drink my weight in delicious beer....

8 plus 1

After yesterdays blog, I was thinking about which big things I could confess up to that I didn't and that not many people knew about and there is one that, out of my circle of friends, only 1 person knows about. I've come a long way since then so its time to fess up and clear out those skeletons. And yes Evol, its to do with me 'volunteering' at the salvos all those years ago.

So before I started working in the wonderful world of resin, I was working for a large 'upmarket' department store in Melbourne. I was still relatively new to Melbourne and it was the first time I was living on my own (when I moved out in Sydney, I lived with my sister) I was finding it really hard going and felt myself barely keeping afloat on the surprisingly poor wages. A friend who also worked at said department store also found that she was struggling and after a few whispered meetings..... we decided to start embezzling money from the department store. At first we were careful and only took when we needed (you know, cause that makes it ok!) but because we were getting away with it, we kept going until we were stocking up our purses before a night out. I even remember the two of us taking ourselves to a well to do restaurant in Melbourne celebrating our genius. It seemed so easy and no one would have ever suspected us as we were two of the most respected and hardest working there.

A few months in a new girl started who was just looking to get caught. She would openly steal clothing and even took one of the security tag removers so she could go to other departments to load up. In short she wasn't careful and had the instore security circling our department like sharks which led them to checking the history of our register and noticing that there were innumerable refunds to the same two accounts. Two days after my birthday I was called up to HR and taken into the boardroom where instore security confronted me and kept me for questioning for 5 hours. At first I denied til I was blue in the face but the evidence was more than enough to convict me. During me questioning I heard that they had brought my partner in crime in as well who was screaming and causing a huge scene from what I could tell. After obviously terminating my contract, they called the police who arrested and handcuffed me and led me through the crowded ground floor cosmetics department, into, yes, the back of a paddy van parked in the middle of Bourke St Mall.
The police then detained me for another 6 hours and took the usual mug shots and finger prints and told me that I'd need to get myself a lawyer. Nearly a year passed which was one of the roughest of my life but it finally started to get better. I got a good job which turned into an amazing job, which then led me to start my own label and none of it would have happened unless I'd been fired.
I finally had to face my court date (which I told my current work was a 'doctors' appointment) and managed to get away without official conviction (which would have meant I couldn't have left the country for 8 years and i would be here) I had to pay all of the money back which I only just managed to do before I came here and I had 6 months of community service, which I told people was 'volunteer work'. You know whats really funny? I actually convinced myself that I was doing volunteer work and started bragging to people about how great it was to give something back! God, even I buy my own bullshit!

After I left, the rumours of the details of my departure were plentiful. From me stealing $50 000 to setting up some sort of designer black market where I was selling clothes half price. I actually remember seeing a few staff members from the department store come into my new work and be totally surprised at how well I was doing. I even remember seeing the old Store Manager on Chapel St who threw a smile my way.

Its strange to reread this blog and to some extent relive it. It was such a long time ago and I'm such a changed person because of it and I have to say, I'm grateful that it happened otherwise I'd probably still be stuck there 20 years later.

8 fabulous tid bits on yours truly

So Evol has tagged me in the latest of blogger games and I'm more than happy to divulge in some juicy gossip about, well, myself. Here are 8 things you may or may not know about Euro...

1. I actually had a twin brother who died a few days after birth. His name was Adam and to this day I still wonder what it would be like to have a male version of me running around.

2. In my previous life (i.e pre Melbourne) I was a drug addict. I had moved out of home when I was 16. One of my best friends died from a heroin overdose and decided that I needed to escape if I wanted to live a life without a bogan boyfriend and 12 babies.

3. (This is one that soyoungsopretty already knows but the rest of you don't) My last boyfriend in Melbourne just before I came here was a bisexual drag queen who worked (and still does!) at a cafe on Chapel St. He only told me after we had decided to be exclusive. My first question (as we lay there in bed) was 'So what songs do you perform?' Shirley Bassey was the response. We broke up 2 weeks later.4. I come from a 'well to do' family in China where there is a village named after us and a temple in our honour to pray for our familie's health and prosperity. I'm like, so totally a princess.

5. I once signed a group of friends and myself up for a talent show where we 'breaked' to Bart Simpsons 'Do the Bartman' In the middle of the performance I slipped and fell on my arse in front of 500 odd people. I have no shame.

6. As much as I pretend I don't take it seriously, I would love to make music full time. My vocal coach (a bitter old woman who was the poster child for those who can't do...) once told me that my voice would never be good enough to 'make it big' in the industry. 10 years on I'm now determined to prove her wrong.

7. I plan on having a fling with a woman at some point in my life. I figure you've got to try everything once and I'm curious to see what its like on the other side.

8. As you may have guessed, I can be somewhat of a list fascist. Love em. Love having things in order that I can prattle off at will. Its no surprise that I have my all time top 5 favorite films (When I was in China visiting the village, I tried to list my top one hundred favorite films but I had nothing to write on and kept forgetting the order) but I also have a secret list of top 5 films which includes both Waynes World 1 and 2, Spinal Tap, Empire Records and Milo and Otis. God I love a good talking animal movie.

So there you have it some shocking and maybe not so shocking revelations about Euro. Soyoungsopretty, your turn...

The Brown Note unleashed

So, the much anticipated SUNN O))) review is finally here, in all its freshly steaming glory. I needed a day to think over the show and really mull over the experience because witnessing that kind of intensity live always needs a bit of perspective for a good review. Plus I still felt really fucking out of it yesterday because i actually lost my hearing for a day so I needed to just chill out before I started reminiscing about it.
We showed up at Queen Elizabeth Hall to an unbelievably diverse crowd. I'm always surprised to find who is a Sunn fan. In the mammoth bar queues (God the English love a good orderly queue!) I started a conversation with a 67 year old man who had brought a lovely looking date (she had no idea what she was in for, the poor thing. Never heard of Sunn. Didn't really understand the kind of music they played, plus she was wearing a neckerchief for God's sake) and was close to shitting his pants prematurely at the mere thought of finally seeing them. It was a lovely night so we ended up hanging outside and having a couple of pints pre-show and missed most of support band, Chrome Hoof which was a shame because what I did see, I loved (think prog/punk with splashes of ESG, Sabbath and Pavement) They were all wrapped up in aluminium foil outfits and had two choreo dancers (a dream job I hope to fulfill one day) to go along with their two drum kits, two bases, a horn section and multiple guitars. As Chrome Hoof finished I turned around to find my beloved Jarvis Cocker sitting in the row behind me! As Chrome Hoof and their belongings filed off stage, the wall of amps started to get piled onto it and at just the sight of all that ampage (there were 10 amps hanging from the rafters as well) I was creaming my pants. I know its pretty bogan of me but there is something I just adore about experiencing music at that level. Its like there is no escape from it. You could have earplugs in and be standing outside but the sound vibrations are so intense that you still feel every pulsating guitar sound. And thats exactly how it was. SUNN O))) are an assault on all your senses but not in the same way that 'regular' metal is. Thrash and Death Metal are more of the recognisable fast and furiously stabbing guitar sounds that you are used to and that has you panting and sweaty by the first 15 minutes. Sunn play music so achingly slow and loud (in their well suited Gregorian-esque hooded robes) that its a slow build up of tension that gets you in the end. Plus their sets are like one huge hour and a half song where you may possibly void your bowels (which I'm happy to report neither of us did, although we did enjoy pointing out which notes could have and then watched the stream of people dashing off to the bog) Its hard to really put into words what a live SUNN O))) experience is like. Its so different from their studio albums and it brings your appreciation of the band to a whole new level. Its pure genious to make noise that is as intelligent and sophisticated as theirs and to see them create this magic in front of you is something else entirely. Every sound they make is hypnotic from the whine of a miced angle grinder, to the gutteral growls of the 'lead singer' to the softer lilting strains of the violin bow on an electric, trying to stand on its own amongst all this noise. As the show came to a close I looked around and saw that just like before, this gig had a huge affect on everyone and no-one would ever be the same again. You are now affected by music in a completely different way where you feel it, instead of hear it. To sum up, the show fucking rocked. All hail the lords, SUNN O)))! For a few images from the night, feast your eyes on this

KENYAN BABIES BABIES BABIES!

I look forward to being uncomfortably energetic

the smartest move?

I'm off to see intense drone metal band SUNN O))) tonight. I scored some freebies and in my attempts to impress the new boyfriend I gave him the other ticket. As I've mentioned in previous posts, SUNN O))) aim to get you to crap your pants. Was it the wisest idea to invite the new boyfriend to a gig where I may be laying some cable mid set?

whats her problem?

Shes just got a big chip on her shoulder

blogger hijinx, sparkly skulls and working the pumps

• So this weekend is shaping up to be a good one. Partly because the festivities started on Thursday with Steven when we had planned a catch up and a coffee, which turned into two, which turned into a lovely stroll through London, which obviously turned into an early drinking session. There is nothing more luxurious than drinking in the middle of the day, in the middle of the week. Steven led me to a cute little bar in Soho, where we settled in with a few pints of Kirin and happily peopled watched whilst simultaneously keeping our eyes on the very cute hobbit-esque barman (there is something so adorable about guys who could fit in your top pocket) Although my chances of scoring with the hobbit may have reduced somewhat when Steven, a few pints in asked 'If you'd want to fuck her?' (do you even remember that?!?) Before we knew it we were surrounded by the after work drinks crowd and a couple of decent looking Aussie boys had taken up residence at our table. I couldn't help but notice one kept giving me the eye (he's only human) Giving my best impersonation of coyness, I shyly smiled back and started a conversation. At this point Steven got the camera out and demanded an on screen pash (dear lord, have you looked at that footage yet?) at which point I think the evening started getting messy when we all had a discussion about the greatness of my boobs and about female genitalia (stop dry heaving evol) Before it got really out of hand we decided it was time to leave but not before a certain blogger had started to piss on a well lit street corner and be interupted mid-stream by the police telling him off. Good Times!



• I started a new job working for this cool bar (I've totally gone all Coyote Ugly) 5 minutes from where I live. I had my first shift last night and although it was really hard work I made some good tips (especially after I initiated the wet t-shirt competition) and got free food and booze, so whats not to like?



• I caught the new Damien Hirst exhibition. Lordy. Talk about being blinded by the light. The centrepiece of the show is the £50 million skull covered in flawless diamonds. Its in a completely blackened room with the exception of one spotlight above it and you really do feel its gravitational pull when you're in there. Other highlights were the shark in formaldehyde that had been split down the centre and placed in two seperate tanks that you could walk between and his series of paintings on the birth of his first child which is so out of his norm and were these emotionally charged pieces that I think has put him in a new light.

• Today its off to frollick down at Southbank and the launch of the renovated Royal Festival hall and a quick dim sum I think. Gawd, life's tough these days....

I'm in shambles, baby

I was recently discussing with SoYoungSoPretty how there has been a lack of celebrity spottings in my London existence. I thought that I would be spotting them left, right and centre (I once spent a week stalking Borough Market because Jude Law had been spotted there) but I really hadn't come across anyone worth blogging about..... until Thursday.

Thursdays at Spitalfields market is antique day, which I aways go to. I have a newly acquired obsession with taxidermy and this week I wanted to take some snaps of the amazing taxidermy stalls there (which will be a later post all about East London) I was browsing at my favorite when I saw the most stunning toad skin purse (with its head as the clasp. It was amazing) I picked it up and continued to walk around. I put it down for a mere second to take some snaps of a taxidermy display and Pete, effing, Dogherty came up behind me and picked it up. That bastard took my friggin purse and when I said to him that I was going to purchase it, he just gave me the biggest shrug his drug laden body could give and mumbled that I had put it down. The bastard then had the cheek to pick up one of the taxidermy peacocks I was admiring, tucked it under his arm, and took that as well! As if I didn't hate him enough!

and just where the fuck have you been?

So as I prepared to watch the Desperate Houswives finale I thought I'd watch the first installment of UK Big Brother to see who it would be that everyone would be talking about. It was an all female lineup to which they will be staggering the release of the males (for the slaughter by that stage) You had your usual celeb hangers on, your posh spice look alike, a couple of 60 year olds (one of which was this complete chav, thats bogan to all you Aussies, who lives near me in East London! I've seen her forraging around the charity bins near the buddhist centre) a pair of hyperactive barbie twins and a feral. All of whom I'm sure I'll bitch post about at a later date but the one that really got my goat was the resident "rock" (and I really do use that term loosely) chic who, when describing her favorite music genre said that she liked this new style of music taking over the UK at the moment called "Indie Music" I'm sorry, What???? New style of music? What the fuck have you been doing the last 15 years of your life you idiot?

I've got a date with John Waters

'Hairspray' my favourite John Waters film, is coming to the West End this year! Although I'm a little nervous to see the remake about to be released (with John Travolta playing the role of the mother that Divine played beautifully in the Waters version) I'm soooooooooooo excited about seeing the stage production. Under this gorgeous exterior lies the campiest of campy queens.

A glimpse into my future...

R.I.P wife, mother..... goat

Rose, the wife of a Sudanese man died last week. She choked on a plastic bag she ate whilst grazing in the street. She was forced into the marriage because she was found fornicating with her owner. Her new husand had to pay a dowry of 15000 dinars for her hoof in marriage. Mr and Mrs Tombe lived a quiet life in the Sudanese burbs until her untimely death. Our prayers are with you Charles Tombe...... you sick sick freak.

I'm having a homesick day, so sue me!

Barca round 2

Last week I went back to my spiritual home, Barcelona to visit friends and just generally kick up my heels. It was so strange going there from here. Its so much more relaxed and everyone just goes about their lives at a much more enjoyable pace. I had to quickly check my Londoner public transport rage at the door because those Catalans were having none of it. Anyways not much to tell. Had a great time, drank too much, nearly didn't get on the plane back here (I left a beautiful sunny 26 degrees in Barca for a cold grey 14 degree London. Someone remind me why I'm here again?!?) The holiday snaps are up and also a few new snaps of London

confessions

I've had this blog for a little while now and I've recently come to the realisation that I can pretty much say anything thats on my mind and no one can stop me. I've never given the address to many friends, so I can say what I like about them. The people that read my blog (with the exception of you my dearest evol) have never actually met me so I can open up my graveyard of skeletons, let my freak flag fly and cut loose (footloose)

So here goes......
As much as I try and deny it, I consider myself somewhat of a music nerd. A musical snob who looks down her nose at those with Take That albums, or those who admit there undying love for that twat Daniel Powter. Funny thing though is that as I profess the genious of Sir Richard Bishop (of Sun City Girls fame) to anyone who will listen, I also have Carpenters records. I've spent many a drunken night telling people of the gloriousness of OOIOO, whilst playing Rumours by Fleetwood Mac at least once a week. And when I gaffawed at someone who had never heard of Animal Collective, what did I listen to the next morning? Dolly Parton. See the thing is that to the average man, Dolly, FM and the Carpenters may seem more embarassing than owning the Grease 2 soundtrack but in reality I have no problem defending the genious of any of these albums. The way that Mick and Stevie layed their tumultuous relationship bare for us all to wallow in was brilliance, and if you've never heard Dolly wailing on Jolene, well then you've never really known heartbreak.

The thing with these artists was that I knew that they were brilliant pieces of important music history that take real investment for people to appreciate. Think about albums like Pet Sounds which is just as brilliant as Sgt Pepper but not even noticed until 30 years past its release date. Same goes for the Kinks Village Green Preservation Society. My latest love though is something I am so ashamed of, I've never confessed its truth to anyone.... until now.

I can't believe I'm admitting this but..... I like Justin Timberlake. Oh God, there, I said it. I like him okay?!? I think he's cute and has this great self depricating sense of humour. Everytime I hear a song of his played I'm inwardly doing the runningman I'm so excited whilst externally moaning more than when my credit card bill comes. I've even found myself flicking through mainstream radio stations hoping to hear it.

Oh man, I can't believe I finally admitted it. I feel so much better. Maybe this will open up the doors for other musical shames to come forward. Oh God I hope not. I just realised theres a Mel and Kim record in my collection that I refuse to own up to.

beauty is pain

shit a brick

A friend just told me that while in New York a few weeks ago doing some VJ-ing he ran into Thurston Moore in a record store and gave him a video of his work. Shit a fucking brick, I'm only 2 degrees of seperation from Thurston. Be warned Kim, he will be mine, oh yes, he will be mine....

acoustical noise..... n shit

The other night Leanne and I went to the Royal Festival Hall to catch the special acoustic tuning event that residents Saint Etienne had put on. It was invite only but seeing as Leanne is the Southbank events manager, she gets freebies to everything so we thought we go along. Thank goodness we did because the show ended up being a fantastic eclectic mix of some of London's best. As well as Saint Etienne (not really my cup of tea. They're too non offensive!) Shlomo (effing brilliant beatboxer) Bert Jansh (Dylanesque folk) Sonic Boom (ex spaceman 3 dude. I love him but I'm sure you can imagine the stuffy old donors crowd that thought he was called Sonic Doom thought. He single handedly decimated the audience) and personal favorite, Billy Childish all played short sets. RFH is going to be brilliant when it re-opens (Leanne is organising the opening party) the sound is pretty much spot on, though there was some echo issues (made worse after sonic boom because the hall was so much emptier) and a bit of unexpected fuzz but all in all the hall is looking fantastic.
I'm really looking forward to the Meltdown festival that Jarvis Cocker is curating. He has put together a great line up and I've wrangled my way into free tickets to SUNN O))) (I'm bragging about this to everyone. If you don't know them, SUNN O))) are a crazy doom/drone metal band thats soul aim is to play music at such a low level that you shit you pants. Literally they aim for the brown note. The last time I saw them I distinctly remember bowel vibrations going on) the Jesus and Mary Chain and also to Jarvis (where I will hopefully get to meet the man himself at which pioint I will more than likely do a SUNN O)))
This Summer is going to be awesome. I can feel it in my waters

slainte!

So I spent the last weekend in a drunken haze in Mighty Belfast. Drinking up a storm, catching up with friends, putting the hard word on this cute gay guy just in case he was curious (some things never change) overall just enjoying the great craic thats there to welcome me every time I spend time in the green isle. All of my friends there are people I've met along the way (mostly Erasmus students in Spain) and are the most lovely people you will meet. Seriously heavy drinkers (there was one drinking game in particular that was played where we consumed around 200 finger widths of alcohol. I wasn't looking pretty the next day) but the most welcoming young'uns (they are all around 20, so I'm the wise old bird when I'm with them) you'll ever come across. Belfast gets a bad rap but I love it. The troubles are all still very real (one of my friends got kidnapped by the IRA a couple months ago and just got away with broken knee caps) but if you look past that, I've found the Northern Irish (because in my mind, they're Irish not British) to be some of the most passionate and generous people I've met. They're so passionate about their history and are so proud about where they come from that I aways feel a bit ashamed that I'm not more vocal about my love of Oz. Its not that I don't love Oz, its just I've never been one to preach about it. I think I actually know more about Irish history and politics than I do about my own history.

I heart JM

So I had my little taste of home the other night at the Mum Smokes gig. Although I was always bound to say that it was a great set (I may still have a teeny tiny crush on Jon Michell, the lead guitarist and vocalist which has reared its ugly head once more seeing as he asked me out. tee hee) I have to say it wasn't their best show. Still good but I guess it just lacked the energy that is always present at their home shows because they never seem like shows, they're like parties. Everyone knows each other and theirs always a bit of banter with the crowd (usually it comes in the form of Justin. He loves a bit of a taunting. Incidentally, he was the one at the Ariel Pink show yelling 'Play some Red Hot Chili Peppers!') The set was a mix of old favorites (they played both Simple Life and Gardening Plans, two of my all time favorites) and newbies (one in particular that had Karl and Justin on vocals. Hmm, the jury's still out on this one) A bit of unrequited feedback showed up and the sound at the George isn't the greatest but truthfully, the show could have been the biggest piece of shite and I wouldn't have cared, I was just happy to see some peeps from home.

HTRK however had the crowd hypnotised. Well at least the males in the crowd were. Their music is the stuff you want to listen to at ear shatteringly loud volume while having sex in a stiflingly hot pitch black room (or maybe thats just me) I don't know why I'm so resistant to like HTRK and I think it just boils down to jealousy to be honest. Jonnine has this unbelievably powerful sexual hypnosis over the crowd. At one point I turned around and the guys looked like a bunch of zombies. What I hate is that she knows it and really plays up on it whilst remaining completely free from humour and any glimpse of self deprecation. Again, is this just my own jealousies and insecurities that are the problem? HTRK are not too dissimilar to my band. We both have these bass-y tribal beats and try to steer clear of the verse chorus verse chorus song format. The biggest difference is that they got to do it first. They even got to move to Berlin first so needless to say their egos are out of control at the moment. When we finally make the move to Berlin though can you just imagine the monster I'm going to become?......

lord of the geeks

The Lord of the Rings stage production is mere weeks away from opening on the West End.

Do I....

a) Make fun of the people who will buy tickets and severly mock the nerds I know that will get dressed up Aragorn style for opening night

b) Don my best disguise, buy tickets and sit in the cover of darkness up the back hiding my love for LOTR

c) Admit to desperately wanting to see the it. Theres nothing wrong with being heavily into sci fi

d) Stop being such a geek

this that and the other

Just a reminder that the Mum Smokes gig is on tomorrow night at the George Tavern (Off Brick Lane) HTRK (Hate Rock Trio) are playing too. There will be a few Melbourne gig regulars there that I haven't seen in nearly a year so it should be good craic.

I finished my English teaching course last week (heaven help the engrish speakers I'll be teaching)and have just applied to teach English at this summer camp in Florence for a month. Can I not decide where I'm bloody going?!?

Just bought tickets to see hip hop/ noise freakery band the blood brothers (evol if you're not already a fan, you should be) Now the torturous wait until the gig in July.....

I'm finally going to get my ass to dover st market tomorrow. I can already feel my pants being soiled at the thought of all that good design under one roof.

Okay the weather is too lovely to be cooped up in this internet cafe. Toodles xx

friends album reviewed by other music.. sweeeeeet

LOVE OF DIAGRAMS Mosaic(Matador) "Form and Function" "What Was I Supposed to Do?"Make room for this Australian post-punk trio, who play darkly wound-up, incredibly tight rock with icy veins and cold hearts. The band's precise, architectural approach is steeped in early '90s noise pop (think Bailter Space or Arcwelder), a stern Factory vibe, and the chilly, glamorous allure of Siouxsie Sioux or Bauhaus. A lot of people have been waiting for a band this good in the genre, one that stayed truest to its roots but was able to offer up a modern-day version that could stand on its own. Crazy catchy hooks, propulsive bass and drums, and jagged guitars almost push this thing in the direction of Mission of Burma or Unwound at times, but the band retains a cool distance from any modern signifiers. Quite a surprise, and a stunning debut all in all. [DM]

Tales from the arctic circle.....

Long time no write my dears. The last couple have weeks have been pretty busy and theres so much to tell you all so lets get down to business

• Iceland was effing brilliant. Not only is it an amazingly varied landscape (the whole island is pretty much built on volcanoes, so rocky roads ahoy) with all the volcanoes, geysirs and hot springs (oh my!) but true to popular belief Icelandic kids are truly the coolest on the planet. I spent my days visiting geothermal spas (being snowed on whilst in 25 degree opaque turquoise water is an odd feeling) trying desperately not to put my hand in one of the geysirs to see what they classed as 'boiling hot', doing a few small hikes, seeing the amazing Northern Lights (no where near as bright as you expect but they danced across the sky beautifully none the less. Photos were pretty much impossible as you would expect but I took some Holga as well so fingers crossed) witnessing the sheer power of some intense recently thawed waterfalls and doing some serious shopping, or well, on my budget, window drooling. For an island that has a population of no more the 375 000, they have a fantastic collection of designers. They even have a Trippen store there. We don't even have one in friggin London! A great selection of second hand stores too where I did make the odd purchase. Its definitely going on the list of top 5 favorite places I've been.
  

• On to one of the best moments of my life, seeing Björk. Although there was a bit of a mishap and I nearly didn't. Note to self: going away over a series of public holidays when you need to pick something up from an office is not a great idea. I was supposed to pick up the tickets for Monday nights gig and the offices were closed Saturday, Sunday AND Monday which led me into a massive panic Monday afternoon when I thought I may not get in. Lucky they had set up a makeshift collection booth outside the venue (the biggest arena Reykjavik has to offer. It was needed) and I got the tickets. Björk had a few special guests up her oversized sleeves (outfit of choice for the evening was a gold imitation frill neck lizard number. It was all very 'Pricilla') and onto the stage piled the 'Björkettes' a neon clad all female horn section and the lads from Hot Chip to handle the beats. The moment I had been waiting years for had arrived. Björk burst onto the stage and broke into 'Hunter' a huge favorite of mine. For such a small package she has huge energy and stage presence although I was a little suprised at how reserved the crowd was. It was her first gig in six years in front of her home crowd and I thought they would be going nuts but it was pretty much just left to me and another solo dancer in the crowd. She then did a few tracks off Volta which were FAN FUCKING TASTIC (I cannot wait for that release date) and then had Antony (of 'the Johnsons' fame) come and join her for Dull Flames of Desire which had me weak at the knees. Other favorites that got an outing and a new arrangement were All is Full of Love, Oceania, Pleasure is all Mine, Army of Me, Hyper-ballad (which got a huge reworking and smack bang in the middle she decided it was time for a bit of a boogie so had the lads put on some pretty heavy dance beats and just danced like a maniac for 5 minutes before realising that she was still playing a gig and that she wasn't doing that alone, although you get the feeling that she really is in a world of her own most of the time and does this for her own enjoyment as apposed to doing it for us) The only real disappointment was that she didn't do a single song from Debut and only a single song encore. Oh and that there wasn't any merch. I'd planned to buy up any morsel I could to keep this memory alive in my mind for as long as I could and all that was on offer was a back catalogue which I already own. Before I knew it it was all over too soon and all I had to mark the occasion was the bill poster I nicked off a wall.

And now here I am in London again with the post holiday blues but with the whiff of Summer travel in the air (I'm thinking hold on Sicilian men, I'm a comin'!) it doesn't seem so bad. If you need visuals of the adventures above, then look at this....

happy chocolate covered holidays

the bestest present ever

So I did it. I finally booked my ticket to Iceland. I'm going for a week (in a week) and I can't wait but you know what sealed the deal? Bjork is playing her first gig in six years in Reykjavik on Monday week and I'm going to be there. I'm. Going. To. See. Bjork. I'm so excited I think I wet my pants a little when I booked the tickets. This time next week I'll be cozying up to some Icelandic cutie waiting for one of my all time top five female idols to blow me away.

going on a banksy hunt

So the last week I have been hitting the galleries pretty hard. There are heaps of exhibitions on as per usual and I've seen some inspiring work.
I caught Damien Hirst's latest show 'New Religion' which was shown in a church. I've always loved his work and his latest exhibition was no exception. It showed how society has transferred its faith in, well, faith to science, all of which I completely agree with.

I checked out a punk fly poster exhibition. These things are never a good idea for me. I always end up moping about awesome shows I've missed. Apparently I missed ESG last year dang nabbit.

The Harry Thubron show which was full of over priced mediocre collages. Doing this type of paper work is fine and yes, some pieces were beautiful but they were fairly bland tonal pieces which didn't warrant the £3000 price tag. I've seen some of his work in the Tate and have tried so hard to like him but to no avail. Speaking of all things pricey, I also caught the Banksy exhibition. I'm sure it comes as no surprise that I love graffiti artists (fyi Twist is my favorite graf artist of all time) and am happy to see them recognised on a grander scale but Oh. My. God. I don't think I've ever seen a stenciled canvas be sold for just under $200 000AUS (apparently he sold a piece for £200 000 in December which is around $500 000AUS) Not to judge but the guy who bought it certainly didn't seem like the type to appreciate it for what it was, rather he wanted to have it to say that he owned a 'Banksy' (which is painfully uber cool with the Sienna Miller types in this town) Who knows, I could be completely jealous and wrong but I sort of think that Banksy sells them at those crazily inflated prices as a bit of a joke on the rich saps that can afford to buy a stencil for such a price. It reminded me of an incident I witnessed before I left Oz when I went to see The Stooges. I was watching as Jim (I refuse to call him Iggy) paraded around the stage like a cock in front of all his hens, knowing that he could fuck as many of them as he wanted and have them do as he pleased. Mid set as if to prove his point, had all the young hapless fools singing 'Now I wanna be your dog' 'with' him. Proving indeed that the masses were in his control. Sort of like Banksy. Since being here I've been on a mission to find my favorite Banksy stencils. There are 114 known pieces in the city (of course the annoying thing is that like any graf art, they get removed pretty soon after they have been put up) and yesterday I found one of my favs on the streets of London for everyone to view. That same stencil was in the gallery for sale for a mere $100 000AUS (not that I would complain if anyone bought 'Gangsta Rat ' for me) Do these rich socialites not realise that THEY are the punch line here?

oh and by the way, does anyone know where the 'maid' stencil is at the moment? I've tried 3 trails for it in Shoreditch and Waterloo that all ended up cold. I heard rumours of it in Camden....
There are a few Banksy rat shots up on my flickr

have a little patience

I'm fulfilling my duties as an ex-pat backpacker and becoming an English teacher in a few weeks. I got sent some pre course assignment work and have to find the past perfect continous tense in this sentence

"When Gary Barlow left Take That he didn't know that Robbie Williams had been planning a solo career for months as well"

illuminating coldcuts

Tuesday night Leanne and I went to see Coldcut. The 'gig' got some bad reviews but I kind of enjoyed it. Although the crowd was always going to be hard to please. When you get a bunch of electronica kids with sci fi geeks and 'artiste' types in the one room, you can't please 'em all. First off let me say it was much more subdued than I expected. I knew it was going to be an electronica tribute to Robert Anton Wilson's 'Illuminatus' but I still thought it could have been kicked up a notch. The couple in front of me fell asleep (well, the girlfriend fell asleep. The boyfriend kept giving Alan Moore metal horns everytime he came to speak. I love Alan Moore and I'm a million shades of geek but that was too much, even for me)

Visually I love Coldcut. They always have a really interesting blend of graphics and use techniques that surprise the viewer and keep you waiting with baited breathe to see what they will use next. They had segmented the show into 4 parts and often layered Wilson being interviewed over the stream of consciousness and his theories.

Being honest I have to say that Ken Campbell was a disappointing speaker. Being THE guy who turned Illuminatus into a stage production I thought he would have had some great tales to tell over the mellowed beats playing in the background, but alas no. I would rather have listened to my mother regale me with tales of her latest adventures in the local gardening store.

Alan Moore on the otherhand was brilliant. He first read from Masks of the Illuminati (the 'tripping' passages) and then read a poem that he had written for the night. He was so captivating he could have been sitting there telling us about his last excursion to the crapper but because he did it with such enthusiasm I would have been taking notes and blogged about his bowel movements. Maybe Alan did deserve the metal horns afterall.

please welcome to the stage 'insert name here'

So I have been talking to the band back home (i.e Sarah) and there may be a 'Changeling' reunion. Sarah is thinking about coming over and joining me and we have decided that our band name needs revamping. Apparently there has been lots of disbandings and regroupings since I have been gone. The Young Professionals are no more, however out of those ashes Spider Vomit has risen as well as The Beaches. Mum Smokes, as I've previously mentioned are together once more and are touring here in a month (coincidentally with Ian and 'Hate Rock Trio' whom I'm not the biggest fan of. Mostly because they have a similar sound to us and they got to move to Berlin first, dang nabbit)

We have decided we need a name that packs more of a punch, something people will remember. Here is a list of my top 5 new band names.

1. Kill Your Boyfriend (this is a fav of Sarah's although I think it makes us sound a little riot grrrl)

2. Well He's a Dickhead (one of mine. I think we may have some man issues that we need to deal with)

3.Psychatric Explorations of the Feutus with Needles (in honour of the Flaming Lips)

4. Machetti Killed the Radio Star
5. Something More Violent (I think this is my fav. It gets straight to the point!)

help tha police

start spreadin' the news.....

So a week into my shiate job and I packed it in. Refusing to be treated like a peasant for peanuts, I told my boss that I had a better job offer and was moving on. Needless to say the tight arse queen of darkness was less than pleased but I realised that it was unlikely that the situation would improve and I would end up even more unhappy than before I started there. I spoke to the parental units (who normally are not big on dishing out the useful pearls of wisdom) and they reminded me of something I had completely forgot.

I had planned to move to New York if it didn't work out here. And from where I'm standing the English cosmos are politely giving me the finger and telling me to bugger off elsewhere. So I am. Or so I hope anyway.... I'm in the process of applying for the visa lottery and am schmoozing up to the old designers who had once made a promise to me before I left that if I did go to the big apple, then they would hire me for the NY store and let me stay in their apartment until I found my own place.

I've decided to leave it up to fate and if I'm supposed to be in NY then I'll get my visa no probs and if not, well then I'll just stick to the bar jobs (its taken me a long time to realise that I'm only in my mid 20's and its ok to take a couple years out of my career life to work in bar jobs and enjoy myself) spend every last penny travelling and finally make my way home.

mysterious trains and design nazis

So, I had my first week at work........ and I've made a HUGE mistake. I had a choice between a job that paid much higher (as in close to $30 000AUS more) and this job (in where I have to get a bar job as well because I can't actually afford to eat more than 1 meal a day, let alone actually go out anywhere) The higher paying job was still in retail and I was desperate to try and break out of it. This new job with the design studio seemed perfect. Yes a big part of it was studio manager admin but it meant that I got to still be in a creative environment whilst I was deciding what I was doing with myself here. Okay to be truthful another lure to this job was that my boss said she wanted to sponsor me (which will be impossible to get if I was working in retail) and if I ever want to live out my dream of opening that gallery/store in Berlin, it would be a whole lot easier (and not involve a wedding) if I had a British passport, which I could of course get in 4 years if I got sponsorship. So I took the pay cut. I thought I was taking the high road and doing the right thing. Sacrificing money for the greater career good. I had a window out of the retail world I loathe so much. My new boss lured me in with promises of pay reviews in a few months and possible trips to Nigeria with her and I fell for it. She said that she ran her company to nuture new designers fresh from college and help them get the real world experience that they needed. It sounded so great.

And then I actually started there.

I have been completely thrown in the deep end. Thrown into the middle of a pool of snide graphic designing sharks. It'll be ok, I thought. Its just because you don't know any of the clients and you actually have no idea as to what you are supposed to do because its a small company and you are the only secretary/p.a/studio manager/researcher. As soon as someone starts explaining what you need to be doing on a daily basis, you will be fine. You work loooong hours (no overtime OR time in lieu) but you will be getting a pay review in a few months right? Looks like I was wrong about that too. I am also in charge of the wages and I'm getting paid the same as the newest designer who has been there 8 months. The designer who has been there the longest is only getting paid £4000 more than I am. Turns out this tight arse likes to see herself as the nurturer for young designers and then sends them on their merry way after 2 years because she like to keep the wages as low as humanely possible. The other girls are only surviving because they either live at home or with their partners who help support them. What do I do? This will more than likely be my only possible chance of sponsorship and if I give up on it, well then that means that I have no choice but to come 'home' in a year, if not sooner. Plus unless I find someone from the EU to marry me, I can say goodbye to opening the store in Berlin. On the other hand, I can't live like this. I'm about to start work in a pub as well on the weekends because I have to plus I'm moving to a cheaper shittier sharehouse in a few weeks. I'll end up really hating London if I stay in this job but I'll be losing so much if I let it go. I feel so overwhelmed and I don't know what to do......

On a completely different note, I saw these two this morning wandering around the back streets of East Londn near my place looking so adorable and lost they completely reminded me of the cute Japanese couple in Mystery Train by Jim Jarmusch

Are you going to finish that?

So after the excitement of getting this job I decided to take myself out to lunch. Something I haven't done once since being here. Off to Chinatown I hopped to fulfil a dim sum desire that had been brewing for sometime. I bought a magazine (also something I haven't done in a long time) and went to this new place that looked ok. I ordered 3 of my favourite things and waited. And waited. And waited some more. When food finally arrived at my table it looked suspiciously unlike what I ordered but I thought maybe they do things differently here. I put chopstick to roll and then to mouth and took a bite. I knew straight away this wasn't mine so I put it back on the plate and flagged over the waiter to tell him. He then realised he had given me the food meant for the woman sitting behind me. Okay slight mix up thats fine. What happened next still has me dry heaving. He said to her (its was all in Mandarin so don't expect a fabulous translation from me) that these dishes were meant for her, oops, sorry. He put one untouched dish down and then put down the dish with the ROLL WITH THE BITE TAKEN OUT OF IT. I was frozen and wanted to turn around to see if maybe he had just put it down for a second whle he was talking. Yes, surely thats what he's doing. No one in their right mind would accept food that has been partially eaten. And its not like it wasn't clear that a bite had been taken out of it. It was a roll for fucks sake that came up short compared to the other 2 on the plate. What is it, the runt of the roll litter? Okay, so maybe he said to her she could have it for free or something because of the mix up. I bided my time until she went to the bathroom to turn around to see my half eaten foodstuff sitting on a plate. Gone. Lets get this straight, she not only accepted food that had been eaten but then ate the remains. I mean for fecks sake, who knows where the hell my mouth has been? Why would you do that? SHE ATE THE FUCKING ROLL I HAD MY MOUTH ON. Is this just me or is this completely insane? I then went to a guitar exhibition that was amazing I think. I don't really remember. I couldn't concentrate. All I could think about was that roll and it was all I could do from not vomiting all over the first electric guitar ever made.

what a way to make a living

So after a month and a half of living the unemployed life, I am once again workin' for the man (or woman in this case) I've picked up a job with a graphic design studio as their studio manager/researcher (i.e I have to do everything the designers don't) It seems like a great company however I fear that I am in a little over my head. Not that I lied during the interview but I may have made myself sound a little more level headed and organised than I really am. I'm hoping that out of desperation for this job a miracle will occur and I will magically be much more organised than I used to be. Who knows, stranger things have happened.
I'm just really relieved to not have a job in retail to tell you the truth. I had an interview as a store manager the other day and I actually started having heart palpitations when she started bulldozing me with questions on my managment style and how I was going to improve sales for the company and eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee (I kind of faded out after a while) I realised that I'm not cut out for the commercial money hungry world of retail management. Dinosaur was definitely an exception to the rule. They were never like that so in turn my management style is not made for the main stream market. I'm happy to be someones (4 someones in fact) research monkey until I decide what I'm going to do next. They have even discussed sponsorship already and are keen to do it so it looks like I really can stay here indefinitely.

I've wasted so much of my life watching movies

When I could have just been watching the 30 second bunny version. Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Brokeback Mountain and Reservoir Dogs are my favs.

what do fat house monsters, absurd bling and snow all have in common?

Alas no, its not a write up of Kate Moss' latest birthday celebrations, its my latest blog. So it snowed here yesterday. A proper snow that London hasn't had in years. I was so excited I ran outside in my Pj's to frollick and take snap shots like this

I then realised that I need to get a wriggle on with this exhibition that I'm submitting work to. I'm having the slight problem though of writing my 'Artist Rationale' Everything I write sounds so wanky and although I'm sure that almost everyones will, I was hoping to not go down that path. Plus I still haven't actually decided what piece I'm sending...

To take my mind off it all, a cat friend of mine, Chicken aka Maggie Smith aka Her Royal Highness Princess Chickalot, has recently set up a myspace. Check it out here. Its a hoot

Meow xxx

blow blow blow blow blow your fuse

I just heard that Bjork is going to be headlining the Glastonbury Festival this year. Sarah, if this isn't reason enough for you to get your feckin' arse on a plane.... well I give up.

Fuck, I think I'm actaully having heart palpitations over this. Forget my whinging pity party, if this is the only reason that I am supposed to be in London, it has all been worthwhile.

Oh My.....

emptying my blog bowels

So its been a while since I've blogged. I thought I had nothing to say. Turns out I was just being lazy and now have the blog runs and feel the need to empty my mental bowels onto my beloved readers (evol, it pretty much just you)
So heres the update on the last few weeks.....

• I'm still jobless. Turns out I have to pretty much start my career from scratch again, as no one cares about you unless you have UK experience. Its so much harder here than I thought it was going to be. Most of the people I know here (all 10 of them) have gone on holidays and my flatmates aren't exactly the 'hey lets have a beer' type so its been kinda lonely. I miss having a routine. I know I can be a bit of a workaholic and I needed a break before I just plain old brokedown but its just getting ridiculous now. I'm not ready to go back to Oz so each day I've been playing out the 'where am I going to move to?' fantasy. I thought about going back to Barca but a lot of my friends there are moving on so I would probably be lonely there too. NY is still there but what if its harder than here, then chances are I would definitely have to go home. I've actualy been thinking about moving to Tokyo. I love it there and I've planned on doing the course so I can teach English anywhere, so why not?

• On a happier note I saw a great exhibition the other week by this group called DA! (direct action) They take over squats (until they get kicked out. They went to court last week for the last place they wre in) and turn them into art/music spaces for up and coming artists who don't have much money but want to exhibit work. It was really inspiring and they seem to have a 'the more the merrier' attitude so I am going to try and get some work in the next squat. I am also getting some pieces together for a show back home in Qld. Its nice to be doing something creative again. I've also been eyeing off yet another guitar.... I know where my first pay cheque is going....

• Some good gigs are coming up but I really can't wait for the 'All Tomorrow's Parties' festival. This year looks to be freaking awesome, especially because 'Mum Smokes' (on my list of top 5 friend's band that are brilliant) will be coming over from Melbourne to play. Woo Hoo!!!

• Hi God People (another one of the top 5 friends bands) borrowed some of my instruments for a performance back home. I've never been given the privilege to perform with them but now my instruments have. I'm getting closer, surely....

• It actually snowed here the other day and I got to throw a snow ball at some kid. There's a school right behind my flat and it was during school lunch time so there were plenty of other misfits to blame it on. The perfect crime. brwwaaaa hahahahahahaha

I've really got to get a job

and stop fluffing about or I will spend my entire time here posting things like this.